HUM SEY HAI JAHAAN
JUST IN CASE
by Vishal Verma

Rating:

What is it?
Just in case it goes to Cannes. I mean I was really impressed by the declaration thingie which was written in the ‘firangi’ language and I grabbed my seat properly without disturbing my female colleague sitting besides me and got ready, expecting a spoof.

But alas, it turned out to be a perfect example of an impish spoof on bollywood baddies almost going kaput.

Just in case some effort could have been made on bollywood baddies, the dig would have been really enjoyable. But first timer Mashhoor (his spelling not mine)Amrohi narrowly escapes from the punishment of committing the biggest crime in the world. i.e. trying to make people laugh and falling to do so in the end.

Here he does manages to make us laugh here and then and escapes from the prime punishment. Ho ho. So what does Mashhoor- the grand son of the legendary genius Kamal Amrohi has to offer?, the late Kamal Amrohi who is still remembered and will always be for such great films like the classical suspense thriller ‘Mahal’ and a not very well known but a masterpiece in its own ‘Daera’, & of course ‘Pakeezah’ & ‘Razia Sultan’ and not to forget the legend was also the dialogue writer of India’s all time classic epic ‘ Mughal –e- Azam’.

But times have changed so does the taste & preferences and the 3rd generation of the Amrohi’s comes up with ‘Hum Sey Hai Jahaan’ and gives us a feeling that it is an attempt or a call to the not so very wealthy producers that if they want to invest in a Priyadarshan or David Dhawan type of flicks and cannot offered the budget then call ‘Mashhor’ for buffoonery.

He really fits the bill as poor man’s David Dhawan, who will give the darshan of senseless laughter whose only purpose will be to entertain and may be become ‘priya’ amongst those who wanna partner in a ‘dhoti’ budget.

‘kahan kahan se indian cinema guzar raha hai’, khair ( read anyway) first timer Mashhor is more than an actor, he must be drinking complan in his childhood. Amazing!!, what energy, Mashhor is the actor, writer, director, and also the choreographer in the film ( now you get the point why I was talking about the ‘dhoti’ budget thingie).

But he impresses more as a writer (not the script but the dialogues). It’s aimed at the front benchers and serves the purpose of tickling the ‘aam junta’s funny bone who doesn’t mind the developments on screen.

What is it all about?
Sameer Khanna (Mashhoor Amrohi- impressive) makes his way to Singapore and lands a job working as an 'Recovery agent’ for Gary Rosario (Jackie Shroff- pls retire from such roles now biddu you deserve much better), an underground racketeer of night clubs.

Earning his livelihood by masquerading and cheating people of their money, Sameer's life takes a tumble when his own brother finds himself in need of financial help. Shown with the dvd of ‘Ghayal’ playing in the backdrop while Sameer talking on phone. With his Boss - Gary Rosario refusing to help him out, Sameer is left with no viable option. He comes up with a vicious plan of kidnapping the daughter of a multimillionaire super star actor, Gyaneshwar Singh (Shehzad Khan – horrible as ever) in order to solve his financial crunch.

In his quest to relieve himself of his unavoidable misery, he promises Esha (played by a kumari named Vishakha Singh who aspires to be a bollywoodbala) a world of dreams and leads her into believing that they are soul mates. He takes her off to a romantic weekend on Sentosa Island (my travel agent was running out of clue to find this place) as I wanted to visit this island. Anyway, let’s go further, with the dual motive of spending some quality time with his newfound love and getting her away from her dad and asking him for a ransom. Seeing a beautiful possibility of living a life full of happiness with Sameer, Esha also agrees to elope with Sameer.

As Ghyaneshwar Singh is led to believe (by Sameer and his accomplice/best friend – played by a pumpkin head with jatas grown by coconut oil) that she has been kidnapped. This revelation forces him to make one phone call to his best friend, Gary Rosario, who promises Gyaneshwar that his daughter will be back safe and sound and that he will appoint his best man to rescue Esha. The man for the job is none other than Sameer Khanna (the guy who kidnapped her in the first place).

Further complications arise when Sameer gets involved in a drug deal, and in the process loses Esha to a gang of drug lords Dabar (Mukesh Rishi – wasted ) and Pran Panwara (Kiran Kumar- okay) who ask Sameer to comply with their horrendous demands in return for her life. Sameer now has to get Esha from the unscrupulous hands of Dabar and Pran Panwara while pretending to never ever have met Esha for his life to be spared in front of Gary Rosario and make all well with his finances.

Now, after some twist and not turns, confusions and good dialogues, everything gets sorted out.

What to look out for?
Mashhor has the presence and he is better in writing dialogues which may go well to the front benchers.

What not?
The entire script demands an ICU treatment as logic and logistics go for toss. What could have been a spoof on baddies in bollywood goes kaput.

What to do?
It’s up to you.